The craziest ways to finish a marathon / How to build your own Martin Jetpack.

8 Nov

7 Tools To Help You Finish That Marathon No Matter What.

Skataz Electric Shoe Skates

Running the race with springs strapped to your feet isn’t the most subtle approach, but you might be able to hide these Skataz electric roller skates with a particularly baggy pair of track pants.

A 350 watt motor can propel a rider to speeds of up to 13.5mph, but staying on the slower side should help you blend in with the pack, and keep the battery running for longer than thirty minutes. Because they’re electric they should be relatively quiet and stealthy, and since they strap to your shoes you can easily get rid of them a few miles before the finish line, letting you claim your handsome certificate of completion. Sadly, they only exist as a prototype waiting for a funder to make them a reality. But I can’t think of a better reason for these to go into production.

Cyberdyne Hybrid Assistive Limb (HAL) Suit

Maybe you’re too proud to resort to using spring loaded stilts or electric roller skates to finish the marathon. You want to cross that line with one foot in front of the other just like everybody else. But your muscles are screaming that it’s not going to happen without a miracle. Thankfully, a company called Cyberdyne has developed just such a miracle.

Their HAL, or hybrid assistive limb, suit is a mind-controlled exoskeleton that can assist those with limited mobility or movement. It’s actually designed for the physically disabled, or those dealing with rehabilitation, but it would certainly help you finish the race with ease. You’ll probably want to wear a baggy track suit so your secret weapon stays revealed, but with the suit doing all the work, you won’t have to worry about overheating. $2,200 (1 month rental)

Martin Jetpack


Martin Jetpack

It’s hours into the race, most of the real athletes have already finished, and you’re struggling to stay on your feet. At this point all the rules go out the window and you’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do to just cross that finish line. So hopefully the night before you had the foresight to stash one of these Martin Jetpacks down a secluded alley.

Using a set of heavy duty ducted fans that run on premium gas from your local petrol station, the jetpack can be flown without a pilot’s license. But you’ll probably want to practice a bit with it first. Its thirty mile range is enough to get you to the end of the twenty six mile marathon route, I would just recommend landing somewhere inconspicuous so you can slip out of your flight suit, back into your running gear, and nonchalantly cross the finish line. $75,000

 

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